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COURTROOM EXCHANGES WHERE SOMETHING GOES DRASTICALLY WRONG

Among our favorites………….

 

  • MILITARY DEFENSE COUNSEL: What was the first thing TSgt Roster said to you that morning? 
    WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’ 
    ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you? 
    WITNESS: My name is Susan! 

 

  • PROSECUTOR: Gunny, what gear were you in at the moment of the accident? 
    WITNESS:  PT gear, ma’am. 

 

  • MILITARY DEFENSE COUNSEL:  Sergeant, what is your date of birth? 
    WITNESS: July 18th. 
    ATTORNEY: What year? 
    WITNESS: Every year

 

  • PROSECUTOR: So Master Chief, the date of conception of the baby was August 8th? 
    WITNESS: Yes. 
    ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? 
    WITNESS: Having sex, sir.

 

  •  MILITARY DEFENSE COUNSEL: Doctor, as a military healthcare giver,  how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
    WITNESS: All of them.

 

  • PROSECUTOR:  Private, all your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to? 
    WITNESS: Oral… 

     


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